Real Talk: Dealing With Sleep Anxiety
Does anyone else majorly struggle with sleep? As you guys know, I tend to be a major stress ball and struggle with anxiety. Who knew that “sleep anxiety” was an actual thing too? If you’re like me and have struggled with it, you know the drill. You lay in bed for hours upon hours upon hours trying to fall asleep. People offer pointers and their opinions on why you’re not sleeping, but you keep waking up in the morning feeling like you’ve got a no sleep hangover.
For me, one night of terrible sleep doesn’t make me extra tired the following night. It turns into a vicious cycle of late nights and anxious mornings. I’ve been dealing with it since I was a kid. I’ve always been a night owl, but at some point falling asleep at 4 AM isn’t cute anymore. Over the past year in particular, I’ve spent quite a bit of time researching & trying new ways to not only cope with sleep anxiety, but actually fall asleep.
Why You Can’t Sleep At Night
The sleep struggle is real. When sleep becomes an issue, just the thought of falling to sleep can cause anxiety and keep you awake. Most of the time, it begins with a few (or 5) bad nights. You try something, whether it’s a relaxation method or even a sleeping pill that helps. After a while, you get used to it and it doesn’t work anymore.
The first thing that everyone with sleep problems needs to address is the “root of the problem”. Some reasons for not sleeping include:
- Life stress
- Anxiety or fear
- Back pain, arthritis or other medical conditions
- Jet lag
- Work shifts
- Noise
- Light
- Temperature
- Alcohol
- Caffeine
- Hormones
Maybe it’s one or a combination of reasons. But the best place to start is pinning down what’s causing the problem. For me, it’s normally a combination of anxiety, noise & life stress. Adding alcohol or excessive caffeine just takes it all to the next level.
How Much Sleep Do I Actually Need?
A valid question. A lot of times I feel like I run off of 4 hours a sleep and am fairly productive. So how many hours of sleep are “normal” and what should I be shooting for? Oddly enough, the amount of sleep you need varies depending on your age, as well as individual needs. Some people need 7 hours, others need a solid 9 to function.
Newborns need anywhere from 12 – 18 hours of sleep a day. Slowly decreasing as we get older. While teenagers need between 8.5 to 9.5 hours of sleep, adults generally need between 7-9.
How to Deal With Sleep Anxiety
There are a ton of ways to deal with sleep anxiety, but I narrowed it down to 5 tips. The first tip is possibly the saddest.
1. Stop drinking!
So basically disregard everything in the photos you see. Boring, I know. But it actually helps. If you can’t figure out what’s giving you sleep anxiety, alcohol may be the culprit. Alcohol affects various parts of your body. One thing that I’ve noticed is that it often causes us to wake up in the middle of the night. It can affect the normal production of chemicals in our body that trigger sleepiness. A lot of the time it may help us fall asleep, but overall is more disruptive and makes us wake up in the middle of the night. On top of that, alcohol can actually cause anxiety. When you drink, your nervous system is affected. Often times, your body will fight the sedative effects of alcohol and put your body into a state of hyperactivity, which can lead to anxiety, light and sound sensitivity and… sleep deprivation.
2. Use a noise machine!
Ok, I actually can’t sleep without a noise machine. I actually travel with a white noise machine everywhere I go. Some of us struggle with silence, others have a hard time ignoring outside (or inside) noises. Not only do I really like the ritual of turning my noise machine on, it is a little reminder to my friend anxiety that we’re trying to chill out, it also helps when my anxiety escalates. I tend to stress out in new places, so when I travel, having something that not only reminds me of home, but helps distract me from new noises and surroundings is a game changer.
3. Turn of your Phone.
Maybe you can’t turn it off completely, but stay away from it. Don’t plug it in to charge on your night stand. If you can’t leave it another room, put it somewhere you can’t reach. Scrolling through your Instagram will not help you fall asleep. Not to mention the glow of your phone screen isn’t going to make your eyes sleepy. It stimulates your brain and the type of content you’re looking at can also cause anxiety. You don’t need to see what your friends are doing or read work emails at 2 AM, plain and simple. I like to use “Do Not Disturb” mode on my iPhone, that way I can allow calls from my emergency contacts and use my alarm, but won’t be distracted by texts or notifications.
4. No TV in Bed.
This is a hard one that I’m totally guilty of. I lay in bed watching episode after episode of random Netflix shows. Depending on the type of shows you’re watching, it can also cause a lot of stress. The noise, the visuals, the content matter… they all stimulate your brain and can keep you awake.
5. Work on Breathing Techniques.
I’m not going to tell you to dab on some essential oils or use a sleep mask. They don’t work for me. If they work for you, great! But one thing I learned as a kid that often helps me relax is a breathing exercise. Square breathing, or mindful breathing, is a trick that can help reduce anxiety. Particularly if you feel like you’re going to have a panic or anxiety attack. Inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, exhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds. Then repeat. A lot of the time, focusing on breathing is a great way to distract your brain from the other stuff making it go crazy.
Other Tips for Falling Asleep
- Create a relaxing environment: Sometimes it’s as simple as updating your bedroom and giving it a relaxing makeover. Maybe you need some blackout curtains to keep your neighbors lights from distracting you. Or maybe you’ve got itchy sheets. Make sure your sleep space is relaxing and you’re set up for a successful night’s sleep.
- Get a new mattress: This is major. The type of mattress you have makes a HUGE difference. Deepening on the type of sleeper you are and what part of your body you sleep on, the type of mattress you have can actually affect you. Tulo can help analyze your sleep patterns and match you with the right bed! FYI you can get discounted rates using my code “erinaschow” at checkout!
- Try a weighted blanket: These blankets are a totally new concept, but I love them! They’re engineered to be 10% of your body weight, naturally reducing stress and increasing relaxation. So it helps relax your nervous system by stimulating the feeling of being held or hugged, helping you fall asleep faster!
- Turn the heat off: I’m always cold, but make sure I turn the heater off when I go to bed. Not only is it easier to fall asleep when it’s a little cooler, it’s easier to breathe!
Do you have sleep anxiety? What tricks have you tried that work?
Other Helpful Posts:
ALL THE FEELS: SELF CARE CHECKLIST
LIVING WITH MY UNWANTED FRIEND: ANXIETY
5 TIPS FOR THE ANXIOUS TRAVELER
